Bloody Tears
by Dreamseer VeeTee
Summary: Mirai Trunks is thinking about how he tried to take to his life, when Chibi Gohan walks in on him.


Author's Note: This story jumps around quite a bit, but it's taking place while Mirai Trunks is in the present. The poem in it is from the book the perks of being a wallflower.

            Trunks woke and pain coursed throughout his whole body.  He couldn't even think straight as he stumbled out of his bed.  

            The purple haired prince reached the bathroom, and didn't bother with the light as he sank immediately to the ground, clutching his head.  His thoughts were beginning to spin around his head now. 

            Slowly Trunks opened his crystal blue eyes, only to be met with blood dripping down his face from his hands.

_Once on a yellow piece of paper with green lines_

_he wrote a poem_

            The blood dripped dismally from his palms where he had clenched his fists too tight during the nightmare that had haunted me once more this night.

            "I can't take it anymore..." Trunks whispered as he ran a tentative fore finger over the new cuts.

            He slowly moved his finger further down his right hand and stopped at his wrist.

_And he called it "Chops"_

_because it was the name of his dog_

_And that's what it was all about_

             A scar ran ragged across his right wrist.  

            Trunks shut his eyes again, letting real tears streak down his pale face this time.  

            How he longed for the times when the scar didn't exist.  For the times when he didn't need it to exist.

_And his teacher gave him an A_

_and a gold star_

            The one thing that his beloved Gohan had always admired about him was innocence. It was the fact that Trunks had never trained to kill the androids, he always trained to save the children's' lives that were threatened.

            Trunks's innocence had vanished a long time ago though.

_And his mother hung it on the door_

_and read it to his aunts_

            It really all had to do with the scar across his wrist.  It was that scar that had taken his innocence, but not his life.

            His mother had been able to give him back the empty life he had been leading... but no matter what she had attempted, Trunks could never have love or innocence again.

_That was the year Father Tracy_

_took all the kids to the zoo_

_And let them sing on the bus_

            ~*Flashback*~

            Trunks had woken and scarcely been able to move.  The room he was in was familiar, it was part of his home after all. Knowing this, he groaned and shut his eyes again.

            He had so wanted the androids to finish off this time, his desire to live had dwindled to nothing.

_And his little sister was born_

_with tiny toenails and no hair_

            He didn't want to live his life anymore.  Why couldn't he be someone else? Someone with a perfect family, a sister, a father, a mother, in a perfect place untouched by this chaos. Why couldn't his love still be alive?  Why couldn't he destroy the androids?

_And his mother and father kissed a lot_

_And the girl around the corner sent him a_

_Valentine signed with a row of X's_

_and he had to ask his father what the X's meant_

            Trunks leaned over in the bed, and picked up the scalpel that was lying so close to his bed.  He fingered it gently, and flinched as it cut into the skin of his thumb.

_And his father always tucked him in bed at night_

_And was always there to do it_

            It was not the first time he had cut himself on any account.  He had done it many times.  The first had been right before he met Gohan to train.  He had felt so useless, worthless, and alone in the world.  He had just picked the razor up and slashed it across his upper left arm. Slowly he watched the blood well up, and begin to pour out of his skin.  He had watched it amazed, and then quietly without telling anyone, he had bandaged the tiny cut. No one had asked about it.

_Once on a piece of white paper with blue lines_

_he wrote a poem_

            Then he had met Gohan and everything was okay again.  He had never been so happy in his entire life.  His love and him were going to avenge the world's pain.  But things hadn't worked out....

_and called it "Autumn"_

_because that was the name of the season_

_And that's what it was all about_

The pain had filled his heart completely again.  He couldn't stand it.  There was no way to free himself. So again he had picked up a razor, and cut himself.  Down his right wrist he cut.  He had no intention of taking his life this time, for he had still believe that he could defeat the androids. Again the blood had poured out of the cut on his wrist, but this time spots appeared in front of his vision.

_And his teacher gave him an A_

_and asked him to write more clearly_

            This time he cried as he bandaged his wrist, and wished more then ever for Gohan to be alive. And now as he held the scalpel, he knew that Gohan wasn't coming back, and that he couldn't defeat the androids, so he intended to bring himself to Gohan.

_And his mother never hung it on the kitchen door_

_because of its new paint_

But as he began to drag the scalpel across his wrist, praying for death,  his mother intruded.  She began to cry as she saw his blood falling to the floor.

            "Why Trunks?" Bulma whispered as she tried to help her injured son.

_And the kids told him _

_that Father Tracy smoked cigars_

_And left butts on the pews_

_And sometimes they would burn holes_

When Trunks told her what he knew to be the truth, she cried more as she tended to the gash he had created on his wrist.  His blood began to mix with her tears as she cried harder seeing his other scars.

_That was the year his sister got glasses_

_with thick lenses and black frames_

"I want to help you see what I believe to be the truth..." Bulma had whispered as she hugged her son.  "Go to the past... see your father... see your love... see Goku... see the truth Trunks."

_And the kids told him why_

_his mother and father kissed a lot_

~*Present*~

            So Trunks had came.  But when the threat arose, his feelings of being no help arose again.  His father cared little for him, and Gohan.... Gohan was a child.

_And his father never tucked him in bed at night_

_And his father got mad _

_when he cried for him to do it_

            As Trunks stood in front of the mirror, the want and need to hurt himself set in again.  No matter how many times he told himself not to, he always would in the end.  So Trunks did the only thing he could.  He seized the razor.

_Once on a paper torn from his notebook_

_he wrote a poem_

Trunks held it carefully as he began to pull it across his silky skin.  The blood began to fall again, and so did Trunks's tears.

_And he called it "Innocence: A Question"_

_because that was the question about his girl_

_And that's what was all about_

"Sensei.... Help me!" Trunks cried out to his long dead koi.

            Suddenly he heard the creak of the door opening.

_And his professor gave him an A_

_and a strange steady look_

Trunks's head snapped to where the door had opened, and black eyes met his own.

            "Oh Trunks..." came the whisper.

            "Don't look Gohan..." Trunks answered ashamed.

_And his mother never hung it on the kitchen door_

_because he never showed her_

            Chibi Gohan entered the bathroom anyway, and seizing Trunks's bleeding hands with a gentleness that Trunks had never thought possibly, he began to rinse them off under cool water in the sink.

_That was the year Father Tracy died_

_And he forgot how the end_

_of the Apostle's Creed went_

Gohan sat Trunks down then, and began to wrap bandages around Trunks's red hands.

            "Are you okay?" he whispered looking up into the elder's face.

_And he caught his sister_

_making out on the back porch_

            Trunks shook his head, the tears still coming down his face.

            "It hurts." he said simply.

            "Of course it does.  You were bleeding." Gohan answered innocently.

_And his mother and father never kissed_

_or even talked_

"Not that..." Trunks replied.  "Everything hurts."

            Gohan paused, and looked back up at Trunks.

            "Tell me." 

_And the girl around the corner_

_wore too much makeup_

            So Trunks spilled the whole story, blood, tears, love, and death to the chibi that stood in front of him, healing him slowly.

            And when Trunks had finished, Gohan didn't speak a single word, but leaned forward and hugged Trunks.

_That made him cough when he kissed her_

_but he kissed her anyway_

_because that was the thing to do_

            Trunks finally wrapped his arms around Gohan in return, and Gohan leaned farther forward and kissed Trunks on the cheek.

            "Let me be your innocence and hope then Trunks.  Because I believe that I love you." Gohan whispered into Trunks's ear.

_And at three A.M. he tucked himself into bed_

_his father was snoring soundly_

            Trunks broke farther down into tears.

            "Thank you Gohan... I love you too..."

            Trunks didn't realize the truth in his words right away, but after he had spoken them, he knew in the depths of his soul that he did loved Chibi Gohan.

_That's why on the back of a brown paper bag_

_he tried another poem_

Gohan had led Trunks back to the room that he was sleeping in then, and put Trunks into the bed, before curling up next to him, snuggling close to his love, and holding his bandaged hands.

_And he called it "Absolutely Nothing"_

_Because that's what it was really all about _

            However Trunks was to get his first wish granted anyway. In the midst of the battlefield, his life was snatched away.  This time though things were different... he didn't want to die; he wanted to continue living with his love.  

_And he gave himself an A_

_And a slash on each damned wrist_

            And then it was Gohan's turn to cry tears of blood as his loved ones were taken away. But his wishes were answered too as his love was returned... and many years later his father.

_And he hung it on the bathroom door_

            And when Trunks left for his time, Gohan's own heart was tested, as he picked up the razor he had found Trunks with.

_because he didn't think_

            But just as he was about to cut, he heard the door creak open.  He looked up and found himself gazing up at his prince who had returned to him after all these years.  Gohan had jumped up and grabbed his prince, forgetting his thoughts of blood and tears, and Trunks had whispered a few words to him.

            "Never again will either of us hurt..."

_he could reach the kitchen._

Author's Note: I think this is one of the crappiest things I've written personally, but it needed to be written.  Review or email at vegetaztwin@hotmail.com


End file.
